A BLACK RAY

ray

Did you listen?

I have felt like this for a while,
but I have kept it all inside.
This time, though, its way too much,
I do not think that I can not cry.
This sense of loss and emptiness,
most people feel it too.
I hope if I don’t voice it,
it will pass on through.

This feeling has not passed,
I think it’s here to stay.
Yet, what is making me feel this,
I really cannot say or lest sense the hope’s ray.
It’s more like something is missing,
than something causing pain.
It’s messing with my mind,
it makes me feel insane.

I have realized something though,
it’s only for me to decide.
Do I want to live my life,
or always wonder why?

A life where no one even knows I exist,
where everything I have ever known was a lie.
A life where everyone avoids me,
where I become just an another forgotten memory.

A life where I question whether the world I am living in is real, or a figment of my imagination,
where nothing seems familiar,
and I forget where I am,
and I don’t know how to get back home.
Destined to walk this lonely world,
forever,
Lost…

I try to tell myself
but the cuts tell me different.
What am I to do with all these dreams of
death and tormenting?
Am I to lock it up and hide my feelings?
That seems the only way.
But why can’t I be saved again?
Am I so damaged that I can’t be saved ?
Broken with every care in my heart.
Do I even have a heart anymore ?
Can I show love anymore ?
Can I smile without hiding how I really feel?
It goes on and on and I have nothing.
No one,forever,
Lost…


©The Honest FablerPooja Mukherjee
©Image Source – Google Images